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50 Ways To Be Embarrassed In Front Of Your Clan
It pains me to say it... but I'm ready to ditch this spoof. Anyone wanna adopt it? 1. Marriage Crowfeather: Yay, another great glorious day of WindClan! *walks out of warriors den and sees Breezepelt* Breezepelt: Hey Dad! Crowfeather: *ignores Breezepelt* I wonder what I should do today... hmmm... lets see... Breezepelt: You know, I caught three ''rabbits yesterday! Crowfeather: Maybe I should.... teach Onestar how to grow out his fur properly.... Breezepelt: *waves paws in Crowfeathers face* Hi! I exist! Crowfeather: *looks around* Could have sworn I heard something.... Breezepelt: THAT WAS MEEEEEE!!!!!! Crowfeather: *glances at the sky* I THINK IT WAS FEATHERTAIL Breezepelt: WHOS FEATHERTAIL??????? IS HE YOUR SON THAT YOU LOVE MORE THEN MEEEEEE???? Crowfeather: Oh, I miss Feathertail *sobs* Her tail was so featherish! Breezepelt: Sooooo.... was Feathertail your daughter you love more then me? Nightcloud: Son.... you don’t want to know who Feathertail is. Crowfeather: She was so preetttyyyy!!!! Breezepelt: Why not Mum? Crowfeather: I want my Fffffeeeeeeeaaaaatttttthhhhhheeeeeerrrrrr Nightcloud: *winces* You just... don’t. You defenitely don’t. Crowfeather: *hugs Feathertail poster* Breezepelt: WHY DO YOU LOVE EVERYONE MORE THEN ME DAD???? YOU LOVE THAT POSTER MORE THEN ME AND MY MOTHER Crowfeather: BE MY BRIDE FEATHERTAIL!!!! IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN STORMFUR WHO DIED NOT YOU MY PRECIOUS Heathertail: *walks out of warriors den and sees Crowfeather so goes back in* Crowfeather: *kisses Feathertail poster* I wish I could marry you Feathery!!! Ashfoot: Is my son getting married? Breezepelt: *angry at being rejected* Uh, yeah. He proposed to the poster, and it said yes. Ashfoot: This is so '''WONDERFUL' Nightcloud: For you. Ashfoot: Nightdeath, arent you happy your mate is going to marry a poster of a mate he wanted to take instead of you but couldn‘t because she sacrificed herself to save a bunch of Tribe cats with really long names and him? Nightcloud: *blinks* Breezepelt: Um, will he have a wedding? Ashfoot: Of course! Leave that to me! He’ll be married by the end of today! Nightcloud: *realising what Breezepelt is doing and liking it* Should I tell Onestar so he can start the... marriage ceremony? Ashfoot: *snorts* No. Leaders don’t do marriage ceremonies. Medicine cats do that. And ''I’m ''telling Kestrelflight. Nightcloud: Fine, fine. Crowfeather: *stops kissing poster* Wait, I’m getting married? Breezepelt: Erm, yeah! Kestrelflight: Crowfeather, do you take Feathertail Poster to be your lawful wedded wife? Crowfeather: I do not know what’s happening. Ashfoot: *crying* He said ‘I do!’ Clanmates: CROWFEATHERS MARRIED TO A POSTER!!!!!! Onestar: *smirking at Breezepelt* Will you babysit the magazine headed kits? Kestrelflight: Then I proclaim you tom and she-cat! Erm, sorry, I mean I proclaim you tom and poster! Breezepelt: CROWFEATHERS MARRIED TO A POSTER! HES MARRIED TO A POSTER! *WindClan turns to stare at Crowfeather. He shrinks, embarrassed.* 2. Names Berrynose: *to Bramblestars imposter* I think Jayfeather shouldn’t be a Medicine Cat anymore. Bramblestars Imposter: WHO CARES WHAT YOU THINK YA TAILLESS SCUM??? Berrynose: *bowing* No-one, oh wonderful one. I am a worthless nobody who doesn’t even deserve to be told off by you. Bramblestars Imposter: BOWING IS AGAINST THE WARRIOR CODE! BE EXILED FOR THREE MOONS!!! Berrynose: That is most wise of you, wise one. I will leave for six moons to please you. Bramblestars Imposter: *squinting* Berrystumpytail, I told you to leave for three moons. Why are you still here? Berrynose: Oh, I’m such a mousebrain! Thank you for renaming me! Bramblestars Imposter: Leave. Berrystumpytail: Yes sir! I’m leaving now! *leaves* Bramblestars Imposter: Bristlefrost! Bristlefrost: *comes over to him* Yes oh glorious law abiding leader? Bramblestars Imposter: I wanted to add something to the warrior code. Bristlefrost: *blinks* That’s a.... great idea! Bramblestars Imposter: I know. *awkward silence* Bramblestars Imposter: I, as leader, have the right to rename all warriors in my Clan. Bristlefrost: That sounds wonderful! What a glorious law abidind leader you are! Bramblestars Imposter: I'm glad you agree with me. *raises voice* Let all cats old enough to memorise the warrior code meet under the High-ledge for a Clan meeting! *all cats old enough to memorise the warrior code gather under the High-ledge for the Clan meeting* Jayfeather: Why am I here? Lionblaze: Because you're old enough to memorise the warrior code, that's why! Jayfeather: *sniffs* Bramblestar has been adding on so many extra rules, I'd have to be an elder to know it all! Bramblestar's Imposter: THAT'S IT. GO INTO EXILE. Jayfeather: But- Bramblestar's Imposter: NO BUTS. Jayfeather: Fine. *goes into exile*